Albuquerque Ain't Got Nothin' on Us

First of all I cannot believe I actually got up early enough to see the Steel Days balloon launch.  I am not a morning person and that combined with a really late night ... well let's just say if I hadn't committed to other people I probably wouldn't have gone.  Second of all, I'm glad I did go.  It started slow, but then got kind of fascinating.

After The Rain

After everyone came home from camping the campers re-pitched their tents to dry out - they had been rained on the night before (Reason #7849 that I DO NOT CAMP!).   Well, Utah had a microburst come through and after an adventure trying to get the Calls' tent a) back in their yard, b) folded down, and c) dragged to their garage we were all soaking wet.  The Calls took me home to change and we discovered that the microburst had also uprooted a tree in my parents' backyard.





Luckily the tree only damaged their fence, but it took out two other backyards (fences and swing set).  Even then it fell in the best possible place and no structures were damaged.  The funny thing about the microburst was that it uprooted this tree, but left a lawn chair sitting untouched on the other side of the yard. Crazy Utah Weather...I didn't miss you at all.

Porkfest 2013

It's been a few years since I was in Utah for the annual July 4th celebration known as Porkfest.  My brothers started calling our Independence Day breakfast that because on that day the consumption of bacon and sausage were virtually unlimited.  The Fourth of July has always been one of my favorite holidays and this year I got to celebrate it with almost all of my family and some of my favorite extended family.

Every year my mother's family goes camping.  Now, I do not camp, but I love spending time with the family and there is a legendary BINGO game played nightly during the excursion.   So, I booked it out to Utah to participate.


Janice and Ferrin bring awesome BINGO boards!


Ferrin is our BINGO caller.  This was the first time I'd seen him costume up for the gig.


There are many variations of BINGO with several winners.


Buddy BINGO is always a favorite.  You pick a buddy and they win candy if you win BINGO.  Some pairs have been buddies for over twenty years!




BINGO is INTENSE.  You better bring your "A" game if you're going to compete with this group!


Although, there is plenty of hilarity 'round the BINGO tables.



I'm so happy I got to enjoy Porkfest and BINGO with this group of spectacular people!  Viva la Independencia y Porkfest!

Dear Utah Drivers:

You suck!  Yes really, you guys are the worst.  Now, I can't say you are the worst in the whole country, but I can say that of the 40 states (plus the District of Columbia) I have driven in you guys are the worst.  I suppose it is possible that North Dakota, Minnesota, or Florida has worse drivers than you, but I can guarantee that Texas, Pennsylvania and at least 38 other states do not.

You are selfish, greedy drivers who love to tailgate, weave across multiple lanes of traffic, and cross the double white lines - all without the use of the turn signal.  I forget that Utah drivers are horrible until inevitably within miles of the border you appear.  Every rock chip, crack, and misfortune that has befallen my windshield has happened within the borders of Utah.  When you consider that I have literally driven my little car to and fro across the country (and drove regularly in the narrow, crowded streets of Philadelphia) this fact is astonishing.

It is not that you drive to fast...I am something of a speed demon myself - it is that you are blatantly unsafe while repeatedly speeding up and then slooooowing down, slamming on your brakes, and rudely refusing to let others merge, and did I mention the tailgating?!  Following distance people - learn it, live it, love it.

I know not all of you living in Utah drive this way, but the percentage of d-bags on the road is really shockingly higher than anywhere else I've driven.  I remember when my parents visited me in Pennsylvania and I was frustrated with my dad's driving through a tollbooth.  Finally I told him, "You can just go, merge smoothly into the toll lane because the people behind you are watching, they know that you have to merge, and THEY WILL LET YOU!"  He didn't believe me, but it is true.  Those drivers have your back - because you'll have theirs tomorrow.

So, drive a little bit more kindly, Utah, and remember to top of your turn signal fluid...it looks like most of you are running low!

Did you see the size of that chicken?!

Anyone who has ever gone on a road trip with me will confirm that fact that I travel by itinerary and never stop for "interesting" attractions along the way.  However, driving through New Mexico I saw a sign for Fort Sumner and thought, "Hmm, why does that sound familiar?"  Immediately followed by, "BILLY THE KID!".

That first sign was approximately 3 hours before you actually get to Fort Sumner so I didn't really think anything else about it until I saw the sign to TURN HERE for Billy the Kid's grave.  Now, I never stop for random attractions and so I smiled and thought, "Hey, my sister (and the rest of the family) LOVE the Young Guns movies (and can quote almost every line) - it'll be interesting to tell them I drove through the town."  And I continued on my way. For two miles. And then, I just couldn't help myself so I turned around and visited Billy the Kid's grave.




There were a lot of creepy, crawly, poisonous things on this little path!



When I got to Utah, the family were all jealous of my detour.  We sat around quoting our favorite bits of the movie and laughing.

Visitor

This little girl spent a little over an hour at my house this afternoon while the big kids went to the park.

"Um, yeah, I don't really know where I am right now."

But I recognize the person who spoils me rotten!


We did most of her favorite things:
The Binky:


Making Derp Faces:


Being Freaking Adorable:


Playing with other people's toys:


Chewing on Fingers:


All of this really wears a nubbin out, so there was also a nap:


This precious little nubbin is one of the people I will really miss when I move!

5 Things

5 Things I've learned this week:

1. You can totally burn food in a crock pot.  I didn't think you could, but you can.  So much for my BBQ Beef sandwiches.
2. While classified as "non-aggressive" mud dauber hornets will become aggressive when you are actively trying to kill them.  P.S. If you come into my house uninvited I will actively try to kill you.
3. My box spring is not a standard depth.  How do I know this?  I'm buying boxes and had to go up a size for one that would fit my non-standard box springs.  Thank you, Kim for making me measure before I bought the box.
4. Freddy's Frozen Custard & Steakburgers will completely satisfy a craving for Purple Turtle and/or Parker's. Nothing will satisfy a craving for a Philly chicken cheesesteak except an actual Philly chicken cheesesteak.  The Roadhouse in Bastrop will quell the craving, without complete satisfaction.
5. I had a job interview yesterday; it was horrible.  They were grossly unprofessional.  Never had I had quite the negative experience that this organization provided me.  I withdrew my application on the grounds of "HELL NO!"

ETA:  Bonus #6 - All the uproar over The Red Wedding has me bewildered.  I remember being SHOCKED(!) when I read it, but the HBO depiction was actually less graphic than my imagination.  Write faster George RR Martin; write faster!