Things I Learned

watching Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve:

1-St. Peter's Basilica is quite possibly the most beautiful place of worship on the planet.

2-There is a LOT of audience participation.

3-The Catholics are really efficient at distributing the sacrament. (Seriously, 10,000 people in 5-7 minutes...impressive.)

4-The Pope is not looking well.

Every year I mull over actually attending midnight mass at the local Catholic church. I've never actually attended (I'm intimidated) and generally I don't get home in time to catch the broadcast, but something just seems right about having a worship service on Christmas Eve. In the LDS church the Christmas program (generally the ward choir sings several hymns and scripture detailing the birth of Christ and his ministry is read) is done the Sunday before Christmas. I've always thought that if we want to refocus attention on the spiritual aspect of the holiday, we should worship on the holiday.

My Christmas was great...lots of family, lots of stories, a lot of little kids running around under foot.

One of our Christmas traditions is that my father always reads the story of Christ's birth from the book of Luke before we were allowed to open a present on Christmas Eve. I am amazed at how short the story actually is. When we were young it seemed like it went on and on and on...now it is amusing to see all my neices and nephews wiggle and squirm while Grandpa gets out the big white Bible and reads the story. It was really a great Christmas, crowded, but great. It was the first time in a couple of years that the whole family has been together for Christmas.

Merry Christmas!

Norad tracks Santa so you can figure out exactly when he'll be at your house. Merry Christmas, everyone.

Frog-mania

First, a big thanks to John Z. Orange who provided me with the original link and the person I'm totally stealing from.

The American Museum of Natural History has a frog exhibit that completely fascinates me. As we all should have learned during the whole corpse flower incident that I am amazed by bizarre things in nature and if they have a webcam of the action....well, all the better.

So I read all about different frog species, poison dart frogs (my favorite), frogs and the ecosystem, and all sorts of interesting facts about frogs and toads.

My personal favorite facts are
1-some frogs actually protect their vital organs and then let the water in their bodies freeze in the winter, and
2-some frogs stop their digestive process and carry their young in their stomachs. When the froglets are born they jump out of the mother's mouth. There is a great photo of that here.

I know, I know....I'm a dork, but at least I'm a dork who is learning something new. :)

The Broken Road

I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you

I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true

Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
Now I’m just rollin’ home into my lover's arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you

Performed by Rascal Flatts

I left my heart...

I met my soul mate today. Big problem, he lives in San Francisco, me...not so much.

A Letter to my City Council

I appreciate your consideration for the vacant council position and feel that *new councilman* is an excellent choice. I like and respect him and would have voted for him had he run in the last election. That said you made a comment last night that is worth noting and discussing.

There is a division of the City Council that is obvious to the most casual observer. It seems as though past conflicts and personal animosity have played the major role in this divisiveness. I had hoped that a neutral candidate, unaffiliated with these past issues, would be able to help refocus the Council and heal some of these wounds. I was deeply disappointed to discover that after two weeks of discussion the City Council was unable to reach a consensus. It seemed as though further discussion would only entrench the ideology of both sides. I think Councilman T will do an excellent job, but feel he was involved in some of the issues that led to this animosity between council members and I am worried and saddened that the council could not clearly see this as an issue. It is deeply troubling to wonder if personal dislike colors the decisions made for this city.

So, as a concerned citizen I am saying now: it is time to put away past conflict, hurt feelings, and the animosity that has been harbored towards one another. It is time to refocus your energies and priorities into what is truly in the best interest of this city.

Again, I appreciate your consideration of my application to fill the vacated city council seat and look forward to being further involved in the issues of the city. Thank you all for your desire to serve and willingness to contribute your time.

I'd like to clarify that this is not sour grapes. I was always a little meh about the whole thing and only applied because of this issue. The new council member is also a former council member. He didn't run in the last election because he ran for a county commission seat. I do like and respect him; I really do think he'll do an excellent job. One of the other finalists made a point in his interview about how he was "blunt to a fault". I find this generally to translate into rude and tactless. If I were blunt to a fault, the letter would have said, "Grow up, get over it, and do your g**damn jobs!"

I live in a vacuum

I spent two hours the other night taking apart and fixing my vacuum because one of the roommates kept vacuuming after the canister got full and plugged everything up. Nice.

Also, whilst screwing the hose back together the screwdriver slipped. I now have a nice purple bruise around a nice Phillips-head shaped puncture wound on my arm. Nice.

Why would they do this?

I went to my favorite restaurant on Saturday, a great little pizza/pasta place down by the University. I've been a regular patron (at least a couple of times a month) for 12 years. The first thing I notice is that they've changed the menu! What! It has been years since they changed the menu, and then, they only updated the look, not the actual offerings. The next thing I notice is that the dinner I usually order is GONE! GONE! I nearly had a nervous breakdown right there. How am I supposed to go on with no pasta?

Love. This. Song.

I was watching the last episode of Season 3 of The West Wing on Sunday night...it's the episode where poor, sweet Special Agent Donovan strikes up a new relationship with C.J and then gets himself shot in a Korean grocery store. The song they play over that montage makes me weep. Every. Time.

(l. cohen)
Originally contained in leonard cohen’s various positions

Well I heard there was a secret chord
that David played and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do ya?
Well it goes like this :
The fourth, the fifth, the minor fall and the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah

Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah...

Well your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew ya
And she tied you to her kitchen chair
She broke your throne and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah

Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah...

(Yeah but) Baby I've been here before
I've seen this room and I've walked this floor, (You know)
I used to live alone before I knew ya
And I've seen your flag on the marble arch
and love is not a victory march
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah...

Well there was a time when you let me know
What's really going on below
But now you never show that to me do ya
But remember when I moved in you
And the holy dove was moving too
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah

Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah

Hallelujah...

[Instrumental]

Maybe there's a God above
But all I've ever learned from love
Was how to shoot somebody who outdrew ya
It's not a cry that you hear at night
It's not somebody who's seen the light
It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah…
Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelu...
Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah

Performed by Jeff Buckley

A Christmas Quiz

1. Who lost $8,000 in It’s a Wonderful Life?

2. What is the biggest selling Christmas single of all time?

3. What was the name of Rudolph’s dogsled driving friend?

4. What Christmas carol contains the line, “O tidings of comfort and joy”?

5. Name the three reindeer whose names begin with “D”.

6. In the song, Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer what did Grandma go to get?

7. What is the last ghost called in A Christmas Carol?

8. What Saturday Evening Post artist was known for his whimsical pictures of Santa Claus?

9. What one reindeer is never mentioned in The Night Before Christmas?

10. What is Charlie Brown’s complaint about Christmas?

11. What Emmy Award winning cartoon was based on a newspaper editorial?

12. What is Frosty’s nose made of?

13. How many times is the name of Santa Claus used in The Night Before Christmas?

14. What does Alvin the Chipmunk want for Christmas?

15. What do you hear on “every street corner”?

16. What is the name of the first reindeer Santa calls in The Night Before Christmas?

17. In The Gift of the Magi, what does Jim sell so that he can buy Della a gift for Christmas?

18. How many days did it take Handel to write The Messiah?

19. What carol contains the line, “And ransom captive Israel”?

20. In A Charlie Brown Christmas what does Lucy want for Christmas?

21. For what stringed instrument was Silent Night originally written?

22. Which state was the first to make Christmas an official holiday?

23. What was the name of the dog that belonged to the Grinch in How the Grinch Stole Christmas?

24. What was the name of Scrooges’ dead business partner in A Christmas Carol?

25. Where did the real Saint Nicholas live?

More Arts and Crafts

Some of these I've linked to before, but what can I say, they are my favorites!

First off for a daily dose of art, The Metropolitan Museum of Art offers a link to this feature. Click on the link for the Daily Artwork Archive. A fantastic idea!

Some architecture or architectural elements...
Architectural Scene and Frame from the workshop of Blausius Fisulator

This Paneling is really quite a breathtaking site.

Floor—can you imagine this in your kitchen?

Studio from the Ducal Palace in Gubbio designed by Francesco di Giorgio Martini
I can't describe how much I adore it.

Interior of the Old Church in Delft by Emanuel de Witte

Furniture and Furnishings...
Lit a la Turque attributed to Jean-Baptiste Tilliard

Lit a la Polonaise

Mantel Clock Movement by Julien Le Roy Enameled by Antoine-Nicolas Martiniere

Pendule a Repetition Movement by Jean-Jacques Fieffe

Mantel Clock Case attributed to Pierre-Phillippe Thomire Movement by Charles-Guillaume Maniere

Paintings...
Autumn Rhythm by Jackson Pollock
I love Jackson Pollock, but can't really explain why.

Young Woman with a Water Pitcher by Johannes Vermeer
Love Vermeer...mostly because he captures the tranquility of everyday moments.

Garden at Sainte-Adresse by Claude Monet
Monet needs no explanation.

The Creation and the Expulsion of Adam and Eve from Paradise by Giovanni di Paolo

Statues, Sculptures etc...
Coffee Can Wreath, New Orleans by William K Greiner

Chimera from the Eastern Han dynasty

Chariots and mounted guards from the Eastern Han dynasty---toy soldiers?

Rhyton in the shape of a human head

Terracotta figures
These remind me of the exquisite fabric sculpting of the Greeks

Sphinx of Senwosret III from the Egyptian Middle Kingdom
And if we have the time we can see the Sphinx...

Other Stuff...
Funerary Wreath
My absolute favorite item at the Getty; be thankful I don't include it every time.

Untitled #13 by Osamu Kanemura

Evening Gown from the House of Worth

Crazy Quilt

Adventures in Babysitting

A couple of weeks ago my lovely stay-at-home-mom sister asked if I would watch her kids while she and N went to some couples party in their neighborhood. Not being one to babysit for free I laid out my conditions: 1-a home cooked dinner (this is always a requirement since she is a good cook, and me, well I don't. cook. ever.) and 2-as long as it didn't snow.

See, L&N live way out in podunk-ville USA where the main (only) access is a dangerous 2 lane highway surrounded by empty fields. So, not only are snow plows scarce out that way, but the snow blows and drifts across the road leaving poor visibility. Add to that the antelope herd that migrates twice daily to feeding grounds and it is an adventure.

I was kidding about the snow; I used to work out in Podunk-ville and have driven the scary road in all kinds of condidtions. I also know that being a stay-at-home-mom-with-4-kids can be incredibly tiring. L needs a night out! Having said that, L called me at work yesterday saying, "Do you still want to come out tonight? I specifically remember you mentioned no snow as a condition. I could call a neighbor."

I told her that I was planning on it, but should a neighbor be available I wounldn't be offended. In fact, I would babysit the kids another night while they went to dinner and a movie. (That my friends, in more like a whole day out on the town since the nearest movie theatre is 45 minutes away.) She definitely jumped at that offer and so, I narrowly avoided a scary drive to Podunk-ville last night.

It's Surreal

I've been misquoted in a newspaper. It was strange reading the article written about the interviews the other day. I got to my name and read a little summary of my presentation. Nothing wrong there, she got it pretty much right, but immediately following the summary, enclosed in quotation marks, were paraphrased ideas I had presented. The information was correct, I just never said those exact words in that order. It was just amateur journalism at its worst. If you want to be credible a credible news source, you can't paraphrase a speech and print it as a direct quote. I thought that was pretty basic, but....maybe not.

I guess if I get this job, I'd better get used to it. This "reporter", that term is being used as loosely as possible, is a regular at the meetings.

I had a nasty title for this, but...

I have an inappropriate sense of humor that is occasionally in bad taste. I love double entendre, so use your imagination to think of my original title....

I talked to J yesterday, just to ask if she’d had any luck finding a new home for her, but mostly for the cat. She told me that “they’d” looked at a couple of places, but nothing yet. She also mentioned that she was thinking maybe the cat would have to move in with her brother until “they” found something else.

I told her that was a wonderful idea because the longer the cat is there the sicker I get. I also mentioned that I have caught the cat on the table several times and on my kitchen counter twice. (Having a cat on the place I prepare food...allergies or no, that is totally unacceptable to me!) The cat is routinely all over all the furniture and I mentioned that now I can’t sit on any of my furniture and since the cat dander has been blown all through the ventilation system even my bedroom is making me sick.

We also talked about how crazy her schedule has been and the fact that she is rarely home before 10:00 pm and out the door around 7:00 am. It seems to me that she isn’t home enough to a-spend time with the cat and b-train the cat to stay off the counters. So, maybe it would be better for all if the cat was moved.

When I got home last night the cat was gone. I don’t know if this will speed up their departure or maybe they’ll figure the cat is better off with someone who is home more than they are or whether or not J will hold a grudge about having to give up the cat. L seems like she doesn’t really care, except for sisterly loyalty. Regardless, at least the cat is gone. I left the furnace fan all day today to blow out they system and tonight I am going to vacuum all my floors and furniture. Hopefully by tomorrow I’ll finally be breathing easier.

So Sad

Tuesday, on The Amazing Race, the sisters from Utah were eliminated. They got stuck on a task unrolling hay bales to look for a clue in the middle. It was a Roadblock, which means one member of the team does the task while the other waits on the sidelines. Lena unrolled hay bales for 8, yes 8, hours and the producers estimated she unrolled 100 bales. What a woman; I wouldn't have been able to do it.

The best quality of this team was that they worked together, didn't argue and didn't do anything to embarrass themselves. A pretty big accomplishment for anyone on a reality show. And yes, I did get a little weepy at the end when Phil walked into the dark field and gave them the bad news.

Who will be Philiminated next?!

The Interview

Well, at least I didn't embarrass myself, which was my main goal. I was the 4th person to be interviewed and having seen the first three, I thought my chances were okay. I had been told to prepare a 3 minute presentation and be prepared for a 7 minute Q&A. Well, the first 3 candidates kind of stood up and stuttered through their marital and family status. My thought, who cares?!

Anyway, when it was my turn I stood up and said point blank, "I was asked to prepare a presentation; so prepare a presentation I did." I went through the 3 questions I thought they needed answered:
1-Why do I want to this position?
2-What qualifies me for the position?
3-What are my priorities and concerns?

Well, I finished my spiel in a little over 3 minutes and they basically shook their heads and said, "Well, you really covered all our questions in the presentation." So, we just chatted for a minute and I was done.

I didn't stick around for the rest of the interviews and I don't know exactly when they'll make the decision, but at least I didn't embarrass myself. *sigh of relief*

All because of a stupid cat...

I’m about to officially give up on roommates and embrace the simpler (read poorer) way of life. J & L are nice enough, really nice actually, but the cat...the cat has got to go. I have discovered I’m very much allergic to said cat. My eyes are rubbed red and raw from all the itching, my throat burns and all I do is sneeze, sneeze, sneeze.

I let J & L know before they moved in that the cat would be on a 30 day trial period, and they both agreed that the cat may need to find a new home. So on Sunday when I told J (the cat is really hers) that I was allergic and the cat needed to move out, she seemed to take it well. She said that almost everyone she knows is allergic to Molly, even if they aren’t generally allergic to cats. She told me that her father hasn’t been able to visit her since she got the cat because he’s so allergic. She also said that she knew eventually she’d have to give it up and she thought she could convince her brother to take Molly in and give her a good home with the benefit of J being able to visit.

Imagine my surprise when yesterday, J, came home around 10 p.m. and announced that she was looking for somewhere else to live. She doesn’t want to move, but she just doesn’t think she can give Molly away. She again told me how pretty much everyone she knows is allergic to the cat, and that it is probably a mistake to get more attached now, since she’ll have to give it up later...etc. but she’s starting to look for somewhere else today.

I asked L whether or not she’d be leaving as well (joint cat ownership and all); she just said it seemed stupid to move again just for a cat, but she’d have to wait and see.

It seems to me that if so many people are allergic to the cat, her chances of finding a new roommate who is not allergic is pretty slim. It also seems that she (J) can’t really afford to live on her own (especially since the few places around here that allow animals tend to be more expensive). So, my guess is that L will only move out if in fact her sister is unable to find a roommate who will take the cat. If J has to move out on her own, I think L will go with her out of loyalty or whatever. Which will again leaves me with no roommates.

GRRR! Seriously, being poor is looking better and better compared to dealing with roommates. On the plus side, if I am appointed to the new position it pays more per month than J pays in rent.

Attention Democrats

If after the recent elections you are seriously considering fleeing the country, here is an alternative. We'd really hate to see you leave completely.

Weekend Update

Last year on Thanksgiving my family had a redneck meltdown, complete with screaming on the front porch. My contribution was saying over and over, “Does it look like we live in a trailer park? Then just stop.”

This year was nice and peaceful. Lots of food, including the absolute best stuffing and pumpkin pie I’ve ever eaten. After dinner, we played a couple of board games and watched what I consider to be the greatest Christmas program of all time, Christmas Eve on Sesame Street. Pre-Elmo, this Christmas classic stars such greats as Grover, Kermit the Frog, Mr. Hooper (remember him?), Bob, David, Linda and Maria (before she got married to Luis), Olivia, Gordon and Susan. Oscar the Grouch tells Big Bird that if Santa can’t get down the chimney there will be no Christmas. Big Bird starts an investigation of how Santa can fit down chimneys....featuring the great songs: True Blue Miracle, I Hate Christmas, and my favorite, Keep Christmas With You... complete with sign language by Linda! Then I forced my family to watch Touching the Void which was airing on PBS.

Yes, I definitely have a lot to be thankful for this year.

Saturday, my newest little nephew, Erki, was blessed. In the LDS church this consists of giving the baby a name which he’ll be known by in life and in the records of the church and a blessing. I would liken it to a Christening. Generally this is done during the Sunday church service, but L&N got special permission to do it on a Saturday since N’s parents were in town from Minnesota. After the blessing both families ate, talked and had a good time. After everyone else had left a couple of us went to L&N’s house to hang out, watch a movie etc. My brother purchased a video game that is basically the old Atari games (River Raid, Boxing, Pitfall, Ice Hockey, Frogger etc.). You get a joy stick box-thing that plugs directly into the TV. All my nieces and nephews were fascinated by the low-tech look and only being able to move up, down or right. It took them quite a while to figure it out. Very amusing for the adults....

Tomorrow I have an interview with the City. I’m supposed to give a 3 minute presentation and then Q&A for 5-7 minutes. I know I’ll be very nervous, but right now I’m kind of...ehhh....wish me luck!

Oh, we got our first real snow of the season. I really, really hate driving in ice and snow. I live out in the country and we don’t get a lot of snowplows near my house. Not so much looking forward to that part.

Bored

I'm bored...everybody left and I'm still here "holding down the fort". What's a girl to do except take a quiz?!

You Are the Individualist

4 You are sensitive and intuitive, with others and yourself. You are creative and dreamy... plus dramatic and unpredictable. You're emotionally honest, real, and easily hurt. Totally expressive, others always know exactly how you feel.

What number are you?

I...Need...Air...*gasp*

I've noticed a rather disturbing trend lately. More and more gas stations do not have air and water stations. For example, my right rear tire is a little leaky. I've been faithfully stopping at the gas station near my house every other morning to check the tire pressure and fill it up.

Several time recently I've started driving and noticed the ride felt, well, kind of weird, and pulled over at a gas station to check the tire pressure. No air station! This seems to be a problem mostly in Salt Lake County, but what the hell?! Don't the good people of SLC need to put air in their tires occasionally as well?

Christmas Already

My boss has his radio on this morning; it's tuned to a station that plays Christmas music 24/7. That's gonna get pretty old!

Seriously Scorpio

Thanks to Erin, for sharing this quiz. I have a lot of people tell me I'm difficult to figure out. The only thing I can tell them is read about Scorpios because (while I don't really buy into the astrology stuff) mine is pretty dead on. Once the rat bastard figured that out, we got along a lot better. The quiz said "Out of 19249 people the average score was 69%"...so I guess I'm more than most.

You are 80% Scorpio

How much do you match your zodiac sign?

More About the Roommates

I came home from work the other day to a sparkling clean kitchen and living room. *yay* for that. However, they had moved all of my furniture around.

Whoa there Betsy! So, I politely told them that while I appreciate all the cleaning (seriously, I really do); I would also appreciate them not rearranging my house without talking to me about it at first. They, I guess, understood and all is well.

As I've mentioned before, they brought a lot of stuff. Well, it just kept coming! Everyday for a week I've come home to more boxes and more stuff strewn about the house. Their old lease expired on the 18th, so I *hope* that is all they have.

Both nice girls, aside from some minor "new roommate" issues, I still think it will work out fine.

Prophecy or Coincidence

"Sooner or later, it was bound to happen. At 0946 GMT on the morning of September 11 in the exceptionally beautiful summer...most of the inhabitants...saw a dazzling fireball appear in the eastern sky. Within seconds it was brighter than the Sun, and as it moved across the heavens—at first in utter silence—it left behind it a churning column of dust and smoke.

More than a million people had their hearing permanently damaged. They were the lucky ones.

Six hundred thousand people died, and the total damage was more than a trillion dollars. It was as if a great war had been fought and lost in a single morning.

After the initial shock, mankind reacted with a determination and a unity that no earlier age could have shown. Such a disaster, it was realized, might not occur again for a thousand years—but it might occur tomorrow. And the next time, the consequences could be even worse.

Very well; there would be no next time."

Rendezvous with Rama, Arthur C. Clarke, 1973

Is it possible that September 11th was destined to be a day when destruction would be wrought, or is it merely coincidence?

Is it possible that someone who hated America with a passion that cannot be conveyed once read a science fiction novel and decided that the opening paragraphs exactly described the evil in his heart?

Is it a coincidence that a plane crashed into the Pentagon at 9:43; 3 minutes off Clarke's imagined travesty? Probably. It all is likely a coincidence, but still, it kind of freaked me out.

The Big Game

The cougar sculptures are wrapped in Saran wrap, the sentries are patrolling the grounds, there are guards on the mountains protecting the "U" and the "Y" from being painted blue or red...these preparations can mean only one thing....it's rivalry week.

Every year the week before the BIG GAME is crazy. Regardless of their records, BYU and U of U fans go hog wild with predictions, bets, and decorations. This year the fever is worse than ever before. Utah has the opportunity to be the first team from the conference to participate in a BCS Bowl Game, bringing millions of dollars and some recognition to our little state; along with Urban Meyer being the most sought-after coach in college football. BYU, with a win, could still make it into a smaller bowl game and Gary Crowton could possibly keep his job.

I grew up in a home where my dad graduated from BYU and my mom attended the U of U; rivalry week was always interesting growing up. Me? I really don't care who wins, although it would be nice for Utah to extend the national (positive) recognition the U is getting. I don't think it'll be close. I think Utah will blow out BYU...think about this stat...Alex Smith, quarterback for University of Utah, is responsible for a touchdown 1 out of 10 snaps he takes. GO BYUofU!

The Amazing Race

I think we all know how I feel about this reality show! Season 6 debuts tomorrow and I couldn't be more excited if I tried. Should you miss an episode you can always check this out for all the latest information and a recap of the episode, along with some very funny commentary. There are 2 racers from Utah this season, so it's an extra incentive for me to watch and cheer (or jeer.)

Any show who coins phrases such as
MY OX IS BROKEN and I'M PACKIN' IT is a must watch show.

...And to Gilday:
Seriously, bunny ears...$9.96 at Wal-mart!

Question of the Day

Last night on the American Music Awards:

Anna Nicole Smith was:
a. Drunk
b. High
c. Both

Full House

So, the new roommates are in (mostly) and have A LOT of stuff. Seriously, I was amazed at how much they both brought. Not to worry, it is stored behind their closed bedroom doors.

As a reminder, when the roommate from hell (RFH) moved in I knew that same night that is wasn't going to work out. I had a horrible feeling about her from the start. No such feelings today, Thank Goodness!!

I'm still a little bit worried about the future appearance of "THE CAT", Molly, but they won't bring her over until their rooms are unpacked and Molly can better adjust. Have a mentioned that J and L are sisters? That would help explain the joint ownership of said cat.

Anyway, things are looking okay. Still a little...on the defensive...but I'm optimistic this new living situation will be a good thing.

New Roommates

Today and tomorrow 2 new roommates will be moving into my house. I had a long conversation with L yesterday, and it seems we have very similar personalities. Her sister, J, also seems nice and easy to get along with, albeit much more outgoing than I.

I am feeling a little anxious, but overall pretty good about the new living situation; I'm excited to have them moving in. I wonder if the roommate-from-hell's purpose was to soften me up and remind me how bad it could actually be.

As an added bonus, L is a massage therapist. *yee-haw*

Quote of the Day

It is easy and dismally enervating to think of opposition as merely perverse or actually evil—far more invigorating to see it as essential for honing the mind, and as a positive good in itself. For the day that moral issues cease to be fought over is the day the word “human” disappears from the race.
—Jill Tweedie

Book List

I've finished:
Stolen Lives by Malika Oufkir and someone else I can't remember. It is Malika's memories of her life before, during and after her family's 20 year imprisonment in the desert of Morocco. It talks candidly about their struggles and joys and the subhuman treatment they received as prisoners subject to the whims of King Hassan II. Their daring escape was nothing short of miraculous in spite of being on the verge of disaster most of the time.

The Bourne Supremacy and The Bourne Ultimatum by Robert Ludlum The two paled in comparison to The Bourne Identity. Supremacy takes place in China where David Webb's wife is kidnapped by the US Government to force him to again become Jason Bourne to save the world from some Hong Kong/Chinese lunatic. And Ultimatum finally resolves the whole "Carlos the Jackal: Master Assassin" situation.

Trace by Patricia Cornwell
Not a werewolf in site, thank God. I was a little tired of her last three "Scarpetta" books revolving around this mutant. Definitely a better story, but the ending was terribly disappointing.

I've added to my list:

Big Bad Wolf by James Patterson
I've read this before, but decided to read it again to refresh my memory for London Bridges the new "Alex Cross" novel from James Patterson.

10th Grade by Joseph Weisberg

Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo

Lullaby by Chuck Palahnuik

Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C. Clarke

The Amazing Adventure of Kavalier & Clay by Michael Chabon

The Dancer Upstairs by Nicholas Shakespeare

Wigfield: The Can-Do Town That Just May Not by Amy Sedaris and some other people.

Anybody have any other recommendations?

I'm hungry

I have exactly $4.37 in my checkbook, my fridge is empty, my car is low on gas and I don't get paid until Monday. *sigh*

For my birthday, my Mom gave me money to go toward the purchase of window blinds for my house and I'm wondering if I dare raid that fund for a little breakfast and a tank of gas. I know, I know, it's pretty pathetic that I've lived there for nearly 3 years without blinds (but with very creative and inventive window coverings); blinds are just so damn expensive.

On a brighter note, two new roommates will be moving in either this weekend or next week. I'm meeting with them later today to go over the particulars. New roommates will bring an end to my poverty-stricken era. *hooray!*

My Birthday

My birthday yesterday was lovely, despite working all day. I've never really liked a big fuss over my birthday and it was a pretty mellow day. Emails and phone calls from family and friends wishing me happy birthday, good presents, and a great dinner. Here's to another great year.

I'm getting old, apparently

I was discussing my neighborhood with my dad a couple of weeks ago and mentioned that I really wish I'd bought the rambler style house rather than the 2-story design I went with. We had been discussing my unfortunate problem with wind tearing off shingles on a regualr basis, and the fact, that I'd never ask a non-professional to go up on my very high, very steep roof.

My father responds that he often thinks I should've bought a one story house because, "as I get older, the stairs will be difficult to negotiate".

Dad, here's a newsflash. I'm 31, TODAY, I think I've got a few good years left.

Christmas Is Here...Almost

Well, not really, but it is November 4th and getting rather late in the season to be planning the office Christmas Party. My boss is terribly indecisive about this kind of stuff and has yet to make up his mind about the location.

"D", I say, "if you don't make up your mind soon, you'll have to take whatever is available. Remember last year?"

Last year was truly horrible. We went to this western themed restaurant. The food was terrible, the room was set up in a bizarre arrangement, no music, no atmosphere and to top it off, the service really sucked.

Part of the problem is that D likes to put on a nice fancy (classy) Christmas party. He lives in the upper, upper class and thinks a fancy restaurant is a good way of showing his respect and appreciation for the group. We have a lot of blue collar, meat and potatoes type of guys in this group and what they really want is all-you-can-eat shrimp and steak and the Sizzler.

This year I've tried to come up with a good compromise. A fancy restaurant will cater, but I've shielded D from the entire menu, giving him 4 entree options (2 beef and 2 chicken). I'm recommending we have the dinner plated, not buffet to give it an upscale feel with "normal" food.

Next up, the really big celebration that runs the whole day with several hundred guests. Oddly enough, that one is a lot easier to put together.

Attention, Attention

Tickets for the 2006 Winter Olympics in Torino, Italy are now on sale. Go here for more details. You know, in case you're planning a trip to Italy in a couple years.

Voting Mayhem

I went to vote this morning before work, knowing that standing in line for 20 minutes now would be much better than standing in line for 1 ½ hours later. I bought my house in early 2002 and immediately registered to vote. I’ve faithfully voted in every general, primary, bond, local etc. election since I turned 18. It is an incredibly important part of being a citizen of the United States.

Being a responsible voter I read my voter information packet and last night checked to make sure my precinct and polling location had not changed. According to the Utah County website, they had not.

However, and here’s where my irritation really starts to build, sometime after 5:00 p.m. last night the Utah County Clerk decided that due to registering 1000 new voters in my city they would create a 3rd precinct and send one of the current precincts to a completely new location. So, I head into the City Offices where I give my name to the election judge. My name is not on the list; I am baffled, my name has always been on the list.

The election judge looks at me and asks, “Do you live east of Redwood?”

Me: “Yes”

Judge: “Oh, then you vote in the Fire station.”

So, out to the fire station I go. The fire station is actually behind the city office building so the walk is about 14 steps, no big deal, right?

At the fire station I wait in line for about 20 minutes before I get to the judge.

Judge: “Name?”

Me: “Caoimhe”

Judge: “You’re not on my list. Maybe you’re on the inactive list.”

Me: “I shouldn’t be, I vote religiously in every election.”

Judge: “Well, our records are kind of messed up, so let’s look.”

My name is not on the inactive list. Now everyone, judges and voter alike, is baffled. The little old man judge takes me over to look at the map.

“Are you along the lake front?” He asks.

“I am.” I respond.

“Well, you’re definitely in this precinct. Let’s have you fill out a provisional ballot.”

So, that is what I do. I fill out the provisional ballot, which won’t be counted until 2 weeks after the election, and not really happy, but okay with the situation I leave. On my way out, I decide to stop back in at the city offices and say hello to an old friend who works there. He is not in his office so I decide to leave him a note. I ask the receptionist for a post-it and start to write a “hey, just saying hello” note when someone comes in to vote. The receptionist questions him about where he lives and when he mentions the name of my subdivision she says, “You are actually in the new precinct and should vote in the Credit Union.”

What the hell? So, I ask her a couple of questions and sure enough the receptionist knows more about the election than the ELECTION JUDGES and now, now I am upset!

So, I go back and talk to the judges in the city offices and the judges in the fire station and nobody seems to know if my vote will count. In fact, one of the judges actually suggested that I just head on down to the credit union and VOTE THERE as well.

Hello, has anyone other than me heard of voter fraud and the federal prosecution than comes with committing it?

So, I called the county and all they could tell me was that they already knew my city was all screwed up with this new precinct and that my vote should count because all the precincts are in the same district with the same ballot. I’ve got a phone number to call in 2 weeks to find out for sure. If it doesn’t count, my next phone call will be to the ACLU followed by a complaint of voter intimidation (does election judge incompetence fall under that?) to the state election board.

Discretion is the better part of valor

I recently found out a co-worker of mine is having an affair with someone in our building. She is married with 2 small children and this is not her first extramarital activity. In fact, the rumor is, she still jumps one of our co-workers whenever they are in the same state, in addition to the latest 3rd floor fling.

The “fling” is a nice guy (stupid obviously, but nice) with a lovely wife and a small son. They have been seen kissing on the loading dock, walking around the pond hand in hand and she apparently hangs out around his cubicle quite a bit. The dangerous part of this little drama is that both his mom and dad work in this building as well. In fact, his dad works about 10 feet away from his mistress every day.

Isn’t this playing with fire? Isn’t it more dangerous than your run-of-the-mill workplace affair? Do they really think they can be seen canoodling around the building and his parents (and therefore, his wife) won’t find out? Can anyone explain to them the definition of discretion? Stay tuned; I’m sure this is an episode of Divorce Court waiting to happen.

First Near Death Experience of the Season

Last night we got the first snow of the season; really it turned out to be just a skiff. You know the type, not enough for the snow plows and salt trucks, but enough to freeze over and make driving a real pleasure the next morning.

First snow, the smart people are driving cautiously; not to fast, not to slow, lots of space between you and the car in front. Except that is, for the jackass in the red Jeep behind me. Traffic had been slow and go, sudden stops, hard stops, and again the blue Chevrolet truck with a dent in the left tailgate in front of me brakes hard. In turn, I brake and see a red Jeep coming toward me, fast! I really think at this point that he’ll hit me. He starts to swerve into the carpool land, and nearly clips the car there. He jerks the wheel right, back into my lane and loses control, spinning 360 degrees across 3 lanes of traffic, looking like he’ll roll at any moment. The tractor-trailer in the lane next to me slammed on his brakes, narrowly missing the jackass of a Jeep driver, as did, fortunately, the car in the next lane.

Jackass Jeep ended up sideways in the middle of the freeway; luckily, still on all four wheels and without being pulverized by the several vehicles behind him. My heart is still pounding and I’m a little nauseous. Do you think this will change Jackass Jeep’s driving habits? Me either....

No power

I was startled out of sleep this morning by my alarm (beep...beep...beep). This immediately made me groan because my alarm is programmed for the radio to come on. This annoying beep only makes an appearance when running on battery power. So, despite my grogginess I quickly ascertained my power was out. I did what any reasonable person would do; I hit snooze and made a promise to figure it out later.

The second time my alarm went off (beepbeep...beepbeep...beepbeep), I wondered if I had a working flashlight or if I'd be lighting a million candles to do my makeup, then I hit snooze again.

The alarm went off again (BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP...BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP...BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP) and I realized that in battery mode my alarm gets more and more aggressive about waking me up, so I caved in turned it off and went in search of a working flashlight grumbling the whole way, "I guess I'll get up, but it sure would be nice to have lights instead." I stumbled downstairs where I vaguely remembered leaving a flashlight on the window sill by my sliding glass door, shivering because my furnace is electric. I successfully located the flashlight, verified that it did, indeed, still work and went back upstairs to pull my hair into a bun and throw on makeup that hopefully would not look circus-worthy.

Just as I opened the bathroom door I heard the marvelous sounds. The sound of my CD player starting, the sound of the furnace kicking on, the sounds that I mean I didn't have to go to work looking like a circus freak.

Mr. October

October is the only time I watch baseball. I'm a Yankee fan, and while my family insists that my loyalty and committment lie only with Derek Jeter they are...well, mostly right. However, I do know the rest of the team and support the team as a whole. In fact, I've insisted that my parents watch the entire series. Last night my Mom made this comment:

"Really, I don't like watching baseball, but watching a game with you is certainly entertaining."

True enough, Mom. I yell, I scream and I make up new rules that would offer shorter games with more scoring opportunities (especially those involving said Mr. Jeter...nudge, nudge, wink, wink).

Currently, I'm shocked and saddened by their performance the last 3 nights. Come on, boys! Buck up, focus and WIN THIS SERIES!!! You can't count on the "Curse of the Bambino" forever.

...On a side note, I'm also hoping the Houston Astro's can pull out their series.

...They lost last night. A valiant battle, but you can't win them all...still pulling for the Astro's.

A little bit about a lot of stuff

1-My car is fixed (hopefully for the last time). It was a pretty simple (and luckily inexpensive) problem that required a new battery. The problem involved my battery being 6 1/2 years old.

2-My darling 4-week old nephew, Erki, was in the hospital over the weekend for possibly RSV. For some reason they were sent home with a laundry list of symptoms to watch for and the advice that it will likely get worse before it gets better.

3-My parents celebrated my least-favorite-sister-in-law, M's, birthday this weekend. My Mom likes to make the birthday boy/girl their favorite meal and invite the entire family over for cake and ice cream. Prior to the wedding a couple of weeks ago M had not participated in any family activity since the 4th of July. Needless to say, the crowd was awfully small at my folks house. It turned out to be myself, my folks, a younger brother that still lives at home and 1 married sibling and spouse. Considering the overwhelming size of the family it was definitely small. I actually felt a tiny bit bad for her...at the same time I can't help but think if you support the family, the family will support you.

4-Another sister, JL, broke up with her fiancee a few months ago when he kicked her and her 2 small children out of his house. He has now "repented of his sins" and wants her back. Small problem, she is seeing someone else (Someone who is much better suited to her, by the way.) and doesn't want him back. Despite having been told that many, many, many times he continues to send her flowers, gifts etc. Now he's requested a meeting with my father. Go away El, but you can leave me some of your delicious homemade cheesecake on the way out!

5-I spent 6 1/2 hours in a management meeting yesterday. Did we get anything accomplished? Not really, but round 2 is scheduled for November 16th.

6-New books added to my list: The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini; Stolen Lives by Malika Oufkir

Morning Has Broken

This morning I rolled out of bed a little earlier than normal and for some reason decided to look out my bedroom window. In the 2 1/2 years I've owned this house I can count on 1 hand the times I've looked out the window (generally during a spectacular lightning storm), but something prompted me.

I pulled back the curtain and noticed that there were lights on in every house along the back of my street. Not just here and there, but most lights in every house. It made me wonder what my neighbors think of me. I have a master bathroom that I do the vast majority of "getting ready" in so I never bother to turn on the bedroom light. In fact, I never turn any house lights on in the morning. I run downstairs, dressed and ready, throw breakfast and lunch into a bag and head out the door.

I wonder do the neighbors ever glance out their window and wonder, "Does she ever get up?"

Car Trouble...Again

So, as you may remember my car needed major repairs a little over a month ago...repairs to the tune of nearly $1000. Well, now it has developed an attitude about starting on a regular basis. It started on Monday, worked fine Tuesday and Wednesday, but when I walked out to the parking garage after work today all I heard was "click, click click".

Monday when it wouldn't start the first time I took it to a shop and had them test the battery, alternator, and starter motor. Everything checked out a-ok. I've kept a battery charger on it overnight, every night, but nothing is quite as much fun as walking back into the building and hunting down burly security guards to push start you.

F-ing car!

Falling Leaves

Tuesday I took the day off work. I lounged around the house all morning and went for a drive up the canyon with R.B. in the afternoon. R.B. is my shooting buddy and originally we were scheduled to shoot. He is also an amateur photographer and wanted to drive the Loop before all the leaves fell off the trees. So, drive the Loop we did.

It is absolutely beautiful up there. Really, really stunning. I think he got some good shots; I’m very much looking forward to seeing them. All in all a terrific day!

Books

Looking back, it’s been a while since I wrote about the books on my list.

I finished:
Ella Enchanted by Gail Carson Levine
I really enjoyed this fairy tale centered on the “gift” of obedience. The movie...it really sucked.

The Bourne Identity by Robert Ludlum
I saw the movie before reading the book and must say I enjoyed both. The key, you understand, is to see a movie based on a book before reading the book. Otherwise, the whole experience is ruined. Loved the book, loved the movie.

I’ve added:
The Bourne Supremacy by Robert Ludlum
I’m actually more than halfway through this one. Not as good as Identity, but still intriguing.

The Bourne Ultimatum by Robert Ludlum
Well, you must read the whole series, right?

Trace by Patricia Cornwell
Her last few “Scarpetta” books have been woefully lacking, but I’m pretty invested in the characters and the series, so I’m giving this one a chance. The tone toward the FBI in her recent books has made me wonder if she, personally, had some falling out with them. Also, it really, REALLY bothers me to see her on the newsmagazines “solving” crimes. No, Patty, I just don’t think so.

Day of the Jackal by Frederick Forsyth continues sitting in the bookcase mocking me. I haven’t read it, but it is still on the list. Since I own a copy it keeps getting pushed back in favor of borrowed or library books. I really will read it eventually. I also purchased two books from the local library “getting rid of old or duplicate book” sale. Both hardback in good condition and they cost me a grand total of $1.25. They are Irish Gold by Andrew Greeley (His first book in the series about the lovely and fey, mystery-solving Irish lass Nuala McGrail and her trusty spear-carrier Dermot Coyne. This one explores who may have murdered Michael Collins.) and The Fourth Protocol by Frederick Forsyth. I don’t remember the plot to this one, but it’s Frederick Forsyth and it was 75 cents. How could I go wrong?

My list seems short, so if you have any suggestions please leave a comment. I’ll be weary of the mystery and international intrigue so please feel free to recommend other genres.

A Wedding to Remember

K&N got married on Friday. It was a lovely reception and fun was had by all. Here’s a little something to add to the “100 things about me” list. I hate photos. Absolutely, positively cannot stand them. I don’t understand photographers...I just don’t understand.

First, it was an LDS Temple wedding, which means if you don’t have a temple recommend you can’t attend the actual ceremony. Many non-LDS get very upset at the idea of this, but in LDS circles that’s just the way it is. Nobody really thinks twice about it. Anyway, the ceremony was at 10:00am. Since I don’t currently have a recommend, I was asked to hold Erki while his parents attended the ceremony. If you ask me, I totally got the better deal. Around 10:30, the bride and groom came out and this is where the families gather ‘round to take pictures. Let me say, it is impossible to take a picture of 70+ people where everyone looks good. Not gonna happen, sister, so spending 10 minutes on setting up the shot isn’t gonna do you any good. Fortunately, pictures requiring my presence were kept to a minimum. I think that was a strategic plan to keep me from dropping the F-bomb at the temple.

After the temple, I went out to brunch with a couple of siblings. Once finished we hooked up with other siblings and went to buy a lovely gift for the newlyweds. We ended up getting a “dirty dartboard” and glow-in-the-dark massage lotion. Heading back to change clothes and get ready for the “formal” wedding pictures we encountered some serious traffic problems. It turns out there were several accidents on an already congested portion of I-15. It took us close to 45 minutes to travel a generally 10-minute distance.

The Reception: everything was lovely, except the pictures. I bonded with K’s sister, L, over our mutual hatred of having our pictures taken and handed out sticks of cinnamon gum to all the wedding party. K’s mom had hired a wedding planner to help with everything and she set up a “family” area where the two families could sit and talk. Mostly, I wandered around talking with the people I knew and stealing mints from the caterer for my nieces and nephews. During the wandering, I was talking to some old family friends when the wedding planner came up and said, “I’m sorry, but you people will have to find somewhere else to visit.” What?! WHAT?! I’m sorry, what did you just say to me?! Needless to say, the wedding planner got a piece of my mind. I basically told her that she was hired by K&N and I was POSITIVE that they would absolutely not appreciate her being rude to their guests. So step off and shut it, lady!

Cutting the cake, throwing the bouquet (which I caught, sort of), and tossing wedding petals as they proceeded to the car. It really was quite a lovely night.

Cheesecake for Breakfast

In my defense, I had a cup of yogurt earlier. What I really hate are the people in the office on various diets who immediately shriek, "Do you know how much sugar is in that? How many calories? I can't believe you brought that into the office?"

You know what....SHUT UP! Sometimes you just need a piece of cheesecake for breakfast. Trust me, one piece will not kill any of you, and you are free to not partake if it so offends your worship of the almighty pound.

As for me, I'll be having a slice of cheesecake for breakfast, and enjoying every damn bite.

It's a Sickness

So, I've bookmarked this site, but in my own defense I don't check it every day...yet. The point of this post is to let everyone know that 500 days from now the 2006 Winter Games in Torino will begin and, of course, they selected the mascots. Which, really, I think are adorable. What can I say? I love the Olympics! It's a sickness.

Ooh La La

K’s shower Saturday was fun. She has known well in advance that her future sisters-in-law would buy a gift designed to embarrass and was trying very hard to get out of opening it in front of the group. The shower was an open house (come when you want and stay as long as you like—also, no dumb games) and while we had a good crowd she was encouraged to start opening gifts. She opened and opened and oohed and aahed over the cookware, tools, sheets and towels until finally there were 2 lonely little bags sitting on the gift table. There they sat proclaiming, “Ooh, La La” until someone innocently asked, “Aren’t you going to open those?”

So, reluctantly she took them down and peered inside. “Wow! That’s great, thanks you guys?”

“What is it?” “Show us!” cheered the crowd, while N stood in the doorway a wolfish and slightly amused smile on his face. He knows his sisters well enough to anticipate what our gift will be.

So red-faced she held up the garments for the crowd’s scrutiny and showed off the slinky, transparent chemise and thong along with a more sedate (but still sexy) red velvet gown. The only complaint came from S (she married another brother a year or so ago), “That is not nearly as NASTY as what you guys gave me!” she complained.

“Just wait,” I promised. “There will still be something slipped into the presents at the wedding....and it will be less clothing, more accessory.” Happy honeymoon!

Maybe I'll stop at 80

I'm having a difficult time coming up with 100 things about me...right now, I've got 80 and it seems like a pretty good place to stop and reflect.

61. Close second, The Amazing Race
62. My sister is my best friend
63. My favorite sculpture is Nike of Samothrace
64. My favorite painting is Sunday Afternoon on the Isle of La Grande Jatte
65. I can seem cold and aloof, but really I’m just shy
66. I’m really good at my job, but could be better
67. I have an itinerary for the world-wide trip I’ll take someday
68. Whiny people irritate me
69. Sometimes that includes myself---there are times when I get sick of hearing myself complain about something and wonder how anyone else can deal with it
70. I expect people to act like grownups about their differences and I’m disappointed when they don’t
71. I have 10 pillows on my bed and I use them all every night
72. I’m extremely ticklish
73. I dislike having my face touched, especially my chin (you can’t see it, but just thinking about it made me shiver....ugh)
74. Someday I’ll buy 5 acres and build a house in the middle of it—imagine the peace and quiet
75. I have 15 giant garbage bags of weeds sitting in my backyard from clearing it out a couple of weeks ago
76. Favorite color: Green
77. I bought a lava lamp night light even though I never use it---I just thought it was cool...and it is
78. Spicy food....yeah, not so much
79. No matter how much stuff I have to do on Saturday, if I don’t spend Sunday hanging around the house getting laundry done I don’t feel like a had a weekend
80. My private life is private....even my family doesn’t usually know who or if I’m dating

Where to Start

Work has been crazy, busy for pretty much a month. I’ve spent all my time putting out fires and working on things that need to be done immediately. This has caused a serious backlog of work on my desk. I’m sitting here staring at all my piles of paperwork, wondering where I should start. The good news is that my boss is out of the office all week. This means I can take it easy and concentrate on clearing up all my loose end, small projects while he’s away. I just need to find the motivation to start.

Friday Fun & Games

I had dinner with K last night at our favorite Mexican restaurant. I hadn’t really talked to her for a while, so it was good to catch up. The wedding is next week and she is running around crazy trying to work out the last minute details. It seems like she’s got things basically under control, just a little stressed out.

She was working on compiling songs for the wedding DVD and after dinner we sat in her car and listened to all the songs my brother (her fiancé) dislikes. I thought all were good and encouraged her to go ahead and put them on the video. I already know that despite his protests, he is really a closet county fan. That, dear brother, can be the problem if you marry someone who is good friends with your sister. We will gang up on you every once in a while.

My sisters and I will be buying K’s shower gift tonight. If all goes well, she will be really embarrassed tomorrow. In fact, my plan is to get her something really embarrassing for the shower tomorrow and then also, slip something in with the wedding presents later. I can guarantee she won’t be expecting that little surprise. Included in the “anonymous” wedding gift will be a book I snagged from my grandparents collection titled, “And they shall be one flesh”, kind of a religious take on marriage. I think it was published in 1967 and has a really groovy purple & pink cover. I already told her she was getting it, but I’m hoping she’ll think I forgot when it isn’t part of the shower gift.

Elsewhere, I’m busy at work. I’ve got a lunch meeting in 15 minutes with a representative from a local hotel. They are really aggressively trying to recruit out business and I’m half wondering if I’m going to get a weekend stay comped out of the deal. Apparently, the hotel industry is heading into their slow season, but still has to meet goals for sales calls. Afternoon brings a couple other meetings and an attempt to clean off my desk for the weekend.

Catching up

It has been incredibly busy in Caoimhe World recently. Last week I took Thursday and (part of) Friday off to kick out the roommate from hell and welcome baby Erki to the world. I planned to take the whole day off, but my boss shot me big puppy dog eyes and asked if I’d be willing to put some time in to prepare for the upcoming 2 day extravaganza of staff meetings. There was also some confusion about a contract I put out to bid that needed to be resolved before the end of the week.

So, to sum up, roommate from hell is gone, but apparently still thinks we’re friends. In fact, when she left she said, “I guess I won’t see you again until K’s wedding.”

WHAT!? I know for a fact that she is not invited to K’s wedding because K is my former roommate and is marrying my brother....which boils down to I’m privy to their feelings about J. My sister, L, just laughed and said she hoped J did show up at the reception because after all the complaining I’ve done she’d really like to meet her.

Erki is cute! I do not subscribe to the belief that babies “look like” someone or other in the family. I can never pick out the eyes belong to this parent, and the nose looks like an uncle, or blah, blah blah. Erki, however, has the same birthmark that all L&N’s children have. He also made the exact same face his older brother makes to express his displeasure. Basically, he’s adorable.

The contract I put out to bid is making me crazy. There are way too many people wanting too many things in the specifications. I personally think once the RFP is out....it ought to be too late for changes....I seem to be a minority with this line of thinking. Bids are due October 1st and I’ll be happy to start analysis and award the stupid thing.

Have you ever seen the episode of Seinfeld with the Summer of George? That would be a pretty accurate description of the rest of my weekend. It was so nice to have a clean and quiet house to myself. Wonderful!

Monday and Tuesday were an extravaganza of staff meetings and general running around. They were very informative (although I may be biased having put them together), but I’m definitely glad they’re over.

Tuesday was capped off with a very interesting invitation and evening with an old flame. Needless to say, this unexpected happening made me miss the season finale of The Amazing Race, but not to worry I taped it. (Also, it was totally worth it!)

Fresh, my ass...

The local CBS affiliate has started a "fresh air" approach to night time news....

They installed a window a la the Today show, and they do an awful lot of stories whilst standing in the street.

What's up with that? It just seems wrong. I mean, I can see they have desks, inside the studio...why aren't they using them? Also, everyone knows when you go to a reporter "live from the newsroom" it just means they're standing in the hall. Why can't they sit at the desk since the anchors refuse to use it?

FYI They are the #1 ranked 10:00 news in the market. HUH!?

I need more Benadryl!

I am allergic to shellfish...I have known it for years and generally I have to eat a lot of shrimp dip to have more than a mild reaction. However, during the medical madness I had a CT scan with contrast (the contrast is made of the same stuff that causes allergic reactions to shellfish) and I landed in the emergency room. I blame that episode for my current problem! Does anybody know if a previous severe reaction will make you ultra-sensitive in the future?

My department had a staff meeting today and all our folks from out of state flew in. Our boss decided to take us to dinner at McGrath's Fish House. Not normally a problem as there are other things to eat there...right?

I learned today that they fry the chicken in the same stuff as the shrimp, and apparently 5 bites of that is enough to cause a reaction. So right now I'm in the middle of a full blown allergic reaction. Not necessarily hospital worthy, but I have taken several tablets of Benadryl.

No difficulty breathing, just lots of itching and soon I'll be really, really sleepy. Let's all just hope I don't break out in hives....

Welcome Erki!

New baby, Erki, born on Thursday, September 16th at 10:10 a.m.
8 lbs 9 oz
20 inches

Mom and baby doing well...

In fact, L went into the hospital for the induction at 7:00 a.m. That's right boys and girls 3 hours and 10 minutes start to finish. The boy literally shot out. :) 2 pushing contractions and he was here. Luckily there was a doctor there to catch. He is super cute and I spent a couple hours just holding him today.

Something we all found slightly amusing as well as secure. They put an id tag on both an ankle and a wrist, and taped his number to his chest. That's right, he's got a super cool "tat". Seriously....CUTE!

Roommate/Family & Misc News

Man, I’ve been bad at blogging every day. I’ve been really busy at work and avoiding my house like the plague because the roommate from hell stills resides there. However, she is scheduled to be gone from my life forever at 9:00 am Friday morning. Words cannot adequately describe how happy I am about that!

I am actually taking a couple of days off work to make sure she doesn’t steal any of my stuff while packing, and as soon as she turns in her key and leaves, I’m installing some new bolt things on the doors. Like I said, words cannot adequately describe how happy I am to be rid of her.

In other news, I went to a birthday party for my nephew last night. He turned 7 and had a great time with his new computer games, DVDs, Ninja Turtle get-up, and Razor scooter. Watching him ride around on that thing was really very impressive. He has great coordination. We also oohed and aahed over the basement my brother-in-law has been finishing for the last 4 months. Thus far it is completely framed. He’s done all the work himself and again, I’m impressed with his handyman-ness. My sister is always complaining that he’s not that handy around the house, but hoo-doggy, just look at that basement!

The basement construction project will be on hold for a couple of weeks while my sister has a baby. She has scheduled her induction for tomorrow at 7:00 am. Given her past 2 deliveries, she plans on being finished by noon at the latest. Details will certainly follow. The entire family is surprised that she’s gone this long. We expected the baby, Erki Nool as I call him, to make an appearance last week, but he is apparently stubborn; he’s probably red-headed like his father, oldest brother and sister.

We also found out my sister-in-law is expecting some time in April and I’ve got a brother getting married in a couple of weeks, so that brings our family to....well, huge. This will bring immediate family to 24! We really are going to have to rent out a hall to have Christmas dinner.

More Stuff About Me

41. I worry about becoming bitter and jaded
42. If Diet Coke contained alcohol; I’d have to attend AA
43. My home is my refuge; I hate when its chaotic and/or messy
44. If you won’t teach your children about sex; then the schools ought to
45. I have no real complaints about my boss or my job
46. I want a tattoo (a Celtic knot) but will never get it
47. I don’t have my ears pierced (or anything else for that matter)
48. I don’t cook...ever....unless you count Eggos and Rice Krispy Treats
49. I’ve broken my nose twice
50. My favorite new books are My Sister’s Keeper by Jodi Piccoult, Peace Like a River by Leif Enger and The Dogs of Babel by Carolyn Parkhurst
51. I keep a written list of books I want to read with me at all times
52. My life is usually boring, but lately has had lots of drama
53. I believe Korey Walker is the only man who looks good in skin-tight Wranglers
54. I know I can’t sing, but truly believe I sound good while singing along with the radio
55. If I don’t like you, you will know it
56. I can be intimidating
57. I like creative, confident men who aren’t intimidated by me
58. McDonalds and the Monster Truck Rally are not my idea of the perfect date
59. Neither is going to a movie
60. My favorite TV show is Alias

A Weekend of Parties Part 1

Ahh, the Cotillion....for any out there who do not know a Cotillion is defined by Miriam Webster as


1 : a ballroom dance for couples that resembles the quadrille
2 : an elaborate dance with frequent changing of partners carried out under the leadership of one couple at formal balls
3 : a formal ball

Our Cotillion was really more like a BBQ. Ok, so it was a BBQ, but we just like to pretend we’re cultured.

The Annual Cotillion is sponsored by my boss for our department, our vendors and all the families. This boils down to a lot of work for me. I spent about a month getting ready for it, and all last week running around crazy making sure the catering was ordered, the park was reserved, the games and activities ready to go, and most importantly the prizes and giveaways were purchased and labeled.

This year we had a few new games...including a very difficult trivia quiz, a very boisterous and often violent dice game, and most exciting 2 (count ‘em 2) piñatas. I was very worried about some kid getting hit in the head with a bat and their parents suing us. Luckily, there were no major injuries and all the kids got A LOT of candy. Everybody who stayed late enough for the drawing won something and this year we had better prizes than ever. Give me a couple more years and you’ll see a Cotillion the likes of which have never been seen before!

So, food, games and prizes...what more could anyone ask for in a Cotillion, well except of course, the dancing and formal clothes.

21-40

More things about me:

21. I can usually figure people out pretty quickly
22. People with truly good and pure intentions elude my understanding
23. I tend to be quick to judge, but struggle not to
24. I believe in God, but am not very obedient
25. My favorite band ever is NELSON (sad, I know)
26. My fantasy is to marry an honest-to-goodness cowboy and live miles and miles away from everything
27. I know that fantasy would never make me happy
28. I like to go target shooting, and I’m good at it
29. I could never shoot an animal
30. I’ve been emotionally destroyed by a relationship
31. I’ve learned not to take business personally
32. I can be moody
33. I am not an animal person, though I wish I were
34. I don’t consider myself a writer
35. I am great with other people’s money, but bad with my own
36. I think life isn’t fair, but it should be
37. I believe you can’t cheat Karma
38. That worries me some days
39. I believe in respecting others’ opinions and beliefs
40. Respecting them doesn’t exclude debating them

A Weekend of Parties

Busy weekend so far, had the annual Summer Cotillion on Friday night and a bridal shower yesterday afternoon. Details to follow...

Better late than never...

I've been working on a 100 Things About Caoimhe list...it has proven to be a rather daunting task, but here are the first 20....

1. My name is Irish
2. I’m Irish only in my soul...the rest of me was born and raised in the States
3. I love books...I’ll read any and everything
4. I’m fiercly loyal to my family and those I call friends
5. If you betray that loyalty I will take you down
6. I’m incredibly independent; stubbornly so
7. Asking for help is the hardest thing I’ve ever done
8. I’m very smart
9. I am a supporter of the arts
10. I think history is fascinating...you just need the right teacher to bring it to life
11. I know a little bit about a lot of things; generally just enough to get me in trouble
12. Pick a topic and I’ll have an opinion
13. I’m pretty liberal
14. I’m extraordinarily liberal for where I live
15. My favorite restaurant is Brick Oven
16. I own my own home
17. I don’t need a man, but they can be nice to have around
18. I am sentimental
19. I will probably never have children, but I love my nieces and nephews more than life
20. On-star commercials (and anything else remotely sentimental) make me cry

I'm Back

I am indeed alive and okay. The last week was busy and none of it was good. So, I decided to spare y'all the weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth (not to mention the whining) and not blog for awhile. The worst (knock on wood) is over, so I'm back. Thank you all for waiting patiently.

I'd Save a Horse

Well, I walk into the room
Passing out hundred dollar bills
And it kills and it thrills like the horns on my Silverado grill
And I buy the bar a double round of crown
And everybody's getting down
An' this town ain't never gonna be the same.

Cause I saddle up my horse
and I ride into the city
I make a lot of noise
Cause the girls
They are so pretty
Riding up and down Broadway
on my old stud Leroy
And the girls say
Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
Everybody says
Save a horse, Ride a cowboy

Well I don't give a dang about nothing
I'm singing and Bling- Blanging
While the girls are drinking
Long necks down!
And I wouldn't trade ol' Leroy
or my Chevrolet for your Escalade
Or your freak parade
I'm the only John Wayne left in this town

And I saddle up my horse
and I ride into the city
I make a lot of noise
Cause the girls
They are so pretty
Riding up and down Broadway
on my old stud Leroy
And the girls say
Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
Everybody says
Save a horse, Ride a cowboy

I'm a thorough-bred
that's what she said
in the back of my truck bed
As I was gettin' buzzed on suds
Out on some back country road.
We where flying high
Fining, whine, having ourselves a big and rich time
And I was going, just about as far as she'd let me go.
But her evaluation
of my cowboy reputation
Had me begging for salvation
all night long
So I took her out giggin frogs
Introduced her to my old bird dog
And sang her every Willie Nelson song I could think of

And we made love
And I saddled up my horse
and I ride into the city
I make a lot of noise
Cause the girls
They are so pretty
Riding up and down Broadway
on my old stud Leroy
And the girls say
Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
Everybody says
Save a horse, Ride a cowboy

What? What?
Save A Horse Ride A Cowboy
Everybody says
Save a Horse Ride a cowboy.

Artist : Big & Rich
Album : Horse of a Different Color

Gotta say, I LOVE this song!

What in the Hell?!

An open letter to the woman in my department who should butt out of things that aren't her concern:

I cannot believe that you actually sent a complaint to KP's supervisor telling him that she uses "our" bathroom and spends 10-15 minutes in there every time she goes! I cannot believe you used the phrase, "We shudder to think what she does in there during that time period." I cannot believe that you stood in the hall and timed her visits! I cannot believe that you sent this complaint despite being repeatedly told that 1-it was none of your business, 2-it is not "our" bathroom--it is a common area bathroom, 3-you ARE NOT the bathroom monitor. I cannot believe that you sent this email complaint from a corporate entity mailbox, thus implicating our entire department in your offensive and stupid behavior.

I am ever so thankful that her supervisor, answered with this, copied to her supervisor's supervisor:
"You are making some assumptions about "things" that I need to clarify.
First of all, KP has a medical condition that requires privacy that that bathroom apparently provides to her and I am not going to monitor her time there as a result.
Secondly, I did not know that there was bathroom segregation in this building nor have I seen the memo from management outlining which bathroom departments are approved to use.
While I somewhat understand your frustration, I am appalled at this email and will be forwarding this to appropriate people in your group to discuss this "situation" with the respect and discretion it deserves. "

I too am appalled and whilst delivering the message to the offending employee's supervisor, put in my two cents worth.

Later I got this email from the offending employee:
"I apoligize for the complaint e-mail. It was not meant to be offensive in any way. "

Then how did you mean it? Because I was seriously offended by not just the email, but where and how you sent it. I think we all know that Caoimhe has an issue with stepping up and standing up for your beliefs...if you have something to say then say it, dammit! And say it with your name attached! And while I'm furious, upset, livid about this, I am not pissed off. Which is very lucky for her...

Happy Birthday!

Happy 20th Birthday to "C"!!!
Remember, no dating outside your decade for at least 5 years.
Have a good one...

Dangerous Assumptions

The other night on "The Amazing Race" Colin nearly got himself arrested. While Christie was trying to calm him down she made an interesting comment. It basically said he should stop making [the persecution he felt] up in his head. The whole situation was blown out of proportion because he made it up in his head.

We all do that from time to time, don't we? We get bits and pieces of information, make assumptions based on that incomplete information and form a conclusion that generally doesn't resemble the truth. We infer things from what is said, what is written, that actually aren't there and pretty soon our perception of the situation is out of control. Sometimes those assumptions and reactions are based on anger, sometimes on fear, sometimes they play into our ego or our biases, but rarely are they based on rational thought. So, I would encourage all out there who have jumped to conclusions, made assumptions about something in your life to go back to the actual facts (the things you absolutely know are true) without inference, without assumption, and figure out how much of the situation you made up in your head.

You may find out you wasted a lot of time, energy, perhaps money or your reputation on something that was largely the product of your imagination.

A Comment

Dude, I can't believe you sent a girl to fight your battle. That was weak, even for you. Especially considering I told you it was over a month ago.

Book Review

Since finishing the wonderful My Sister's Keeper (thanks again Erin and Jen), I've finished:

The Well of Lost Plots
It was a really good book, but definitely took some getting used to. I love the way Jasper Fforde created a whole world where literature is as real as reality.

Dogs of Babel by Carolyn Parkhurst
Please read this book! It is about the journey of a grieving husband trying to come to grips with the sudden death of his wife. She fell from an apple tree in their backyard...the only witness is their dog, Lorelei. Paul embarks on a journey to teach Lorelei to talk, to reveal all her knowledge, all her secrets of his wife and the last day of her life. Very touching. The answers are always there, we need but to recognize them.

Also, "one girl" is looking for some book suggestions. If you've read any great books lately head over and give her the benefit of your wisdom. Expand her horizons. :-)

How did you get here?

Aside from the loads of "Caoimhe" searches, some more interesting ones have recently shown up....

airport bra wand
wife gift
leslie silbert
white trash neighbors
were explaining
picasso, carafe, jug & fruit bowl (oddly 4 people found my site this way)
anti-dentite
lortab and waitressing
housemate from hell

Ahh here it is....

Eritrea has a strategic geopolitical position along world's busiest shipping lanes; Eritrea retained the entire coastline of Ethiopia along the Red Sea upon de jure independence from Ethiopia on 24 May 1993 although a border dispute is still being settled because of protests from Ethiopia.

The median age is 17.5 years old with a population of over 4 million...can that be possible in this day and age?

There are only around 36,000 phones in Eritrea most of them located in Asmara and no cell phones. There are around 9,000 internet connections in the entire country.

There are 18 airports, but only 5 with paved runways.

There is 1 television station.

53% of their population lives below the poverty line. They are a desperately poor nation with most of the population relying on subsistent farming and/or herding.

These are the things you learn if you pay attention to the Olympics.

Where in the World?

Zersenay Tadesse representing Eritrea won a bronze medal in the men's 10,00m. Wait, where the hell is Eritrea?

The Olympics

Last night, NBC aired the finals of the great Olympic sport of TRAMPOLINE in primetime. That's right, TRAMPOLINE!! I really do love the Olympics...

Update

Just got home from dinner with the future roommate. I am feeling much more comfortable with having her move in. It seems as though she has had serious reservations about the current roommate (you and me both, I told her). So, good times...I'm feeling more and more like it will all work out.

I'm just sayin'

The needle stick from this morning left a big bruise on my left arm...I told her to take the blood from my right arm; I've got an awesome vein there...never bruised. Ever.

I'm a little scared to drive home. I get these commuter alerts that tell me about accidents and delays...there are currently, ALOT. Will I ever make it home? Don't know....

Did I mention my roommate is out of town until Saturday? Did y'all hear that big sigh of relief...

You Remind Me of Somebody

I've been on a James Spader kick ever since he appeared on The Practice last season. Pretty in Pink, Mannequin, Wall Street, and Stargate to name a few. I also stumbled across a independent movie he made with Maggie Gyllenhaal called Secretary.

It was...interesting...E. Edward Grey was uncannily similar to someone I've met in my own life, though he would never admit it. He gets off on control and domination and once he loses that power, he loses interest. The biggest, and most important, difference between J and this character is that E. Edward Grey plays the game honestly and with a willing companion...both people know and enjoy the different roles they play. Call J on the game and suddenly he doesn't want to play anymore; he's terrified of a level playing field. Instead he preys on the unknowing and unsuspecting in a morally reprehensible act of cowardice and someday Karma will come back to bite him in the ass....

...although, he might actually enjoy that...

101 Dalmatians

Well, really just my 101st post. YAY ME!

I went to the dentist this morning to get the permanent crown. Took about 1/2 hour and I'm all done. HOORAY! Although, I do have to go back in a couple of weeks to get everything cleaned and polished...I made them promise to give me anesthesia. I'm the first to admit that I'm a big wimp when it comes to dental work.

After the dentist, I had to run over to the local clinic to get some blood drawn. I haven't had that happen since the medical madness. It was kind of funny because the technician was being very solicitous and was explaining everything like I was 2. I remember when I had my lumbar puncture, I had to have about 10-12 vials of blood drawn...so many, in fact, that the vein in my right arm gave out and they had to stick my left arm to get all the blood for the tests. To this day, I still don't know what tests required that much blood, although the neurologist indicated they need several tests done so they can compare results with the spinal fluid. Ahh, memories....

So long, Fare well

I gave my roommate a termination notice last night, so she'll be moving out by September 17th. I found out that she had cornered my future roommate (who I already know that I like and we'll get along...in fact, we're having dinner tomorrow night) and told her that she should really consider looking for another place because I...I was difficult to live with!! Now, I'm the first to admit that I have my own quirks having lived alone for so long, but seriously, do you really expect your landlord/roommate to provide sheets, towels, soap, toilet paper, etc. and not get mad when you break their stuff, have strangers spending the night and continually receive phone calls in the middle of the night. Some of this wouldn't be an issue if we were both renting from some 3rd party landlord, but this is MY HOME!! I've made a 30 year commitment to this place and I'll be damned if I'll put up with a spoiled little party girl ruining it and making me feel uncomfortable living there. If that is unreasonable, then call me unreasonable....

...and if you call me unreasonable, then you just wait until after I have a stroke to find out what unreasonable really is.... :-)

Did I mention the Olympics?

A list of Olympic sports I would find myself watching:

Archery
Athletics (Track & Field)
Badminton
Baseball
Basketball
Boxing
Canoe/Kayak Flatwater
Canoe/Kayak Slalom
Cycling: Mountain Bike, Road & Track
Gymnastics: Artistic, Rhythmic & Trampoline
Handball
Hockey
Judo
Modern Pentathlon
Rowing
Sailing
Shooting
Softball
Swimming
Sychronised Swimming
Table Tennis
Taekwondo
Tennis
Triathlon
Volleyball: Beach & Indoor
Waterpolo
Weightlifting
Wrestling

So, yeah, that's about everything. This is the place to go for a quick snapshot of the medals standings. Currently the U.S. and China are battling for most Gold medals and most overall medals. GO USA!

You can read profiles of all the athletes, teams, coaches, judges, etc. here. There are over 200 countries participating in Athens and thus far, 44 countries have medaled. Congratulations to all the medal winners!!

Have I mentioned how much I love the Olympics?!

Weekend in Review

Friday:
Opening Ceremonies...WOW! I especially loved the costuming for the floats. Light up pregnant belly and Bjork...umm, NO! Everything else....YES!

Those who watch the Opening Ceremonies with me are required to watch the entire parade of nations. For most of the athletes this is their moment to shine; most won't medal and have never been heard of, so this is their time in the spotlight and we will pay them the utmost respect. The Brazilian outfits...COOL!

Saturday:
We went through some old books from my Grandparents. They had an odd and varied collection. They also had some books signed by the authors and other famous/important people. My siblings and I decided to leave the valuable books with my parents...we'll fight over them later.

More Olympics!

Chinese food for dinner...not a good idea.

Sunday:
Dinner with my family and a quick trip to the hospital for an ultrasound with my sister. Since her husband was absorbed in the Olympics I volunteered. Always, up for the chance at a "sneak peek" at the little one. She's expecting her 4th and a friend who is a nurse at a local hospital told her to stop by and they'd take a look at the baby's position. HEAD DOWN, GOOD TO GO!

The baby is currently nicknamed Erki Nool...don't ask.

More Olympics!

Today:
Roommate is still crazy...and still driving me crazy!

Paid the speeding ticket, $92! The good news is the "points" won't be reported on my driver's license so the insurance won't know.

Boss in all day today, explaining the late post tonight.

More Olympics! Also, explaining the late post tonight.

The Games of the XXVIII Olympiad

I love the Olympics, especially the Summer Games. I start out thinking, well, I really only like gymnastics or diving, but pretty soon, I'm sucked into caring about the track & field, beach volleyball, sailing, swimming, archery, handball, table tennis...basically everything. While the whole world might not be watching the Opening Ceremonies tonight, I definitely will!

Stuff from Yesterday

Yesterday I went shooting again and had, quite possibly, the best time ever. This time we went in the morning so it wasn't too hot and basically shot targets until we ran out of ammo. My shooting buddy and I have a lot of history between us. He knows me better than almost anyone else and I always have a great time with him. I can pretty much tell him anything and everything and he'll understand why it's such a big deal and why I'm so worked up about it. Good times, good times. We've got another outing tentatively scheduled for October.

The down side of the day was that the A/C in my car quit working a couple of days ago and I had to get it fixed. Since I took a day off work for the shooting event, I begged and pleaded to get my car looked at yesterday. Lucky for me, I have good connections at the dealership, having sold my soul to them for 8 long years. It cost $150 to fix, but oh, the joy of driving to work in air-conditioned comfort. It will definitely make me more pleasant to be around.

Also, my roommate's hair is now pink...I'm just saying....

I'm not crazy

This is exactly how I feel this week!

Quote of the Day

Great nations write their autobiographies in three manuscripts, the book of their deeds, the book of their words and the book of their art. Not one of these books can be understood unless we read the two others, but of the three the only trustworthy one is the last.
—John Ruskin

If it's not one thing....

1-Is anybody else having difficulty signing in to Blogger? For about a week of so, I've had to enter my username and password at least 10 times to get it to work. When I finally get my dashboard, I get a message saying my session has expired. Then I have to sign in another couple of times before it lets me in for real. Anyone else having this problem?

2-I have pretty much decided to give the new roommate the boot. It is one thing after another with her. Last night, she knocked on my door at 11:00 to announce she'd broken my TV and would replace it as soon as she has the money. What the hell is wrong with this girl??!!

3-Just as it is becoming apparent I need to kick out the roommate I have serveral major expenses coming due. Namely, the dental bill, the speeding ticket and my car needs to be registered. I'm seriously considering getting a part time job for a few months. Yuck, is all that comes to mind.

4-I'm thinking an arranged marriage is really the solution to the money/roommate problem. No dumb-as-rocks girl breaking my stuff, someone to pay 1/2 the living expenses, sex on a regular basis....and your own bedroom and bathroom. Anybody need a green card??